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| Saturday, August 16 2008 03:20 PM |
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Subject: Base Weblog |
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stop take some time to think |
stressed! I only blame myself for the mess I'm in. Right now I want to lock myself in this room and sleep, but I can't sleep cause of the shit on my mind. Am I happy with where I am and what I'm doing. I love school and all that but outside of that am I happy with what I'm doing with my free time? Probably not. Yeah I have friends who I adore and am thankful for. I just want some decent sleep on something other then an shitty futon. I want some decent sleep with someone I can talk to about this shit. I am stubborn at opening up and I can't stop feeling shaken and empty inside. I feel like I'm coming up short of what I should be. I feel like I am proving the wrong thing to the right people. How like life. My vision feels like when I look somewhere it takes a second to adjust and realize what I'm looking at. My body constantly aches. I do feel like breaking down and just ballin my eyes out which sucks cause that's not what I do. haha, I'm not tough guy by any means but when I was back home I was the guy people went to when they had things on their mind. Now that I'm down here I'm not sure anymore. I'm SO in the red money wise that I'm panicking which is another reason why I want to lock myself here so I don't do anything.
Everyone always says I want to escape or runaway but that wouldn't solve anything. I don't run away from situations and I know that's apart of growing up I mean I'm a grown man but mentally I'm getting tired and worn thin.
Meh
signed,
Travis |
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